Ok, so, centerpieces. I feel like we've gotten
to know each other fairly well by now, so you can probably tell that I have
expensive tastes, coupled with a thrifty (ok, CHEAP) outlook on life. Not a
good combo.
With that in mind, here is the thing about flowers:
They’re gorgeous. They smell nice. They make everything pretty and girly and
soft. They also cost a sh*t ton of money. And then they die. I might as well set 20s
on fire like I’m Lil Wayne at a strip club!
Now I’ve already told you about my plan to cut the
budget fat in areas that are low priority. Frankly, flowers were an easy area
to trim,but I couldn't imagine a flowerless wedding altogether. So, we finally settled on real flowers
for the bouquets and DIY silk flowers for the centerpieces and pomanders.
Early on, I fell in love with the look of
submerged orchid centerpieces. They were elegant yet modern.
What I wasn't so
keen on was the price. One florist at a bridal expo quoted me as much as $90 a
pop for these puppies! Soooo not
happening, I thought. So, I did what any DIYonista (pass it on, I'm trying to make it a thing) would do: I studied them closely and decided I could do them
myself. Alas, orchids don’t come cheap, even at flower market prices. Plus, I didn't want to spend the morning of my wedding assembling my centerpieces (3
vases per table x 15-20 tables = A LOT of centerpieces). If this was going to
work, we had to use silk flowers.
Now, I’ll admit that I've never been a huge fan
of silk flowers because they don’t look, feel or smell like the real thing, but
it made the most sense for the budget and allowed us to assemble the
centerpieces with plenty of time. Besides, since they will be under water,
people won’t be able to feel or smell them. All that was left was finding cheap
silk orchids that looked real enough, and some vases to stick them in. Tip: if you’re submerging your flowers, there
is no point in spending more on true touch since nobody will actually be touching them.
Also, if you’re planning on using silk flowers underwater, be aware that the
vase basically acts like a magnifying glass. Inspect the flowers very closely.
If there are frayed edges, it will show. If the paint job is shoddy, it will
show. Basically, any imperfection will be exaggerated. For this reason, I would
not recommend using dollar store flowers if you can afford not to. I know you're dying to see what we ended up with, but this post is already running long, and my lunch hour ended 5 minutes ago (whoops!). So, you'll have to wait for the next post to find out what we ended up with! Did you use real or silk flowers for your centerpieces?
This winter we
checked a big item off our do-do list: Pre-Cana!
As many of you know, this is a prerequisite to
getting married in a Catholic Church and many bees have already discussed their
own experiences with it.
Disclaimer: Please understand that this is only mine and
Mr. Waterfall's personal opinion of Pre-Cana and everyone has a different
journey. With that in mind, here is our take on it:
Wemeant to get Marriage Prep done last summer, while we still had a lot of free time, but always had
scheduling conflicts. After putting it off again and again we buckled down and blocked
off the next available date; no rescheduling, no excuses.
I begrudgingly sent the diocese a check for 225
big ones, which I personally thought was an OBSCENE amount to charge for
something that's mandatory and supposed to be beneficial and help lower divorce
rates.
Anyways, I'll admit that I was very anxious about
the whole thing and didn't know what to expect. To be honest, I was
half-expecting a public shaming of all couples currently living in sin and a
pledge to never use contraceptives. One particular nightmare I had involved Mr. Waterfall and me somehow finding out that we were absolutely incompatible and
ending in this scene from The Simpsons:
Each diocese has a slightly different way of doing things, but in our case,
it was a weekend-long activity. So, off we went on Friday night after
an already exhausting work week, with all of our misconceptions and
reservations.
I must say that we were very pleasantly surprised. We arrived and were greeted
with cookies and coffee and given a folder with several worksheets and booklets
along with name tags. The facilitators started off by going around the room and
having each couple introduce themselves. In total, there were 11 couples from
different backgrounds and even several inter-cultural couples besides Mr. W and
myself. I would say that the age average seemed to be around the 25-30 mark. At 9 years and
counting (new show opportunity on TLC?), Mr. W and I shared the record for
longest relationship with another couple who were getting married in a few
weeks, but the average length of the relationships was around 2-5 years.
We discussed a wide variety of topics over the weekend, including:
Readiness (Why are we getting married now/ to each other/ within the
church? What are some of our life goals? What are our expectations for
housekeeping, finances, raising children, etc?)
Communication and Conflict Resolution
Time and Money Management
Sexuality...yup, who doesn't yearn to experience the awkwardness of
Sex-Ed all over again!
Natural Family Planning
Marriage as a Sacrament
our handouts/ personal picture
We had a lot of different facilitators, some were clergy, but most were
married Catholic couples who were able to give concrete examples relating to
their own life experiences. For instance, one question for reflection was how
we would deal with an unexpected pregnancy and/or having children with special
needs and one facilitator was very honest about her own experience and
challenges in raising her youngest son, who has Down Syndrome. As a couple, we found this to be very refreshing anda
heck of a lot more relatable than getting marriage advice from someone
who's celibate!
Most topics were broken up into presentations as well as individual worksheets
that we were called to fill out (sometimes individually, sometimes as a
couple). Participation and sharing was encouraged but nobody was made to feel
uncomfortable by having to share their answers publically. Overall, the topics
of readiness and communication were the most beneficial aspects for Mr. Blogger
and me, and though for the most part, it was things that we had already
discussed privately (such as goals, splitting up finances, how many
children/when/how far apart/how involved will our families be, etc) it was a
nice validation to see that we were on the same page for most things. Surprisingly,
we still had a few surprises and things we continued to discuss when we got
home at night, despite having been together as long as we have. Either way, it
was a great way to open up communication on little day-to-day things like who's
expected to do laundry or dishes.
As you can see, we wrote TOYOTA for car
maintenance, because, let's be honest, that just ain't happenin'!/ personal picture
It also forced us to visit much deeper topics like dealing with infertility
or children with special needs. Interestingly, we learned that the Catholic
Church disapproves of IVF, because of
the "ethical and moral connotations of discarding fertilized
embryos", among other reasons. Huh, go figure.
We also had to sit through a rather awkward presentation on Natural Family
Planning complete with talk of mucous secretions and microscopic images of
sperm. While Mr. W and I will not be adopting the church's position on this, it
was still very well presented by a certified teacher of the Billings Method,
and at no point did we feel forced or pressured into adopting NFP. In fact,
they made sure to emphasize that this was only one position and we were free to
take it or leave it.
Lastly, we had two priests come in to talk to us about the sanctity of
marriage as well as what that entails for the church (marriage is for life,
etc.). For the most part, we were very pleasantly suprised at how "with
the times" they were, and didn't feel like we were having religion shoved
down our throats, despite being a faith-based seminar (except for one
particular rant about cohabitation and how it's a terrible way to start a
marriage). Though we understand the Church's viewpoint on this, it's also a
modern reality that most couples do choose to live together before committing
to spend their lives together (this was definitely the case for most couples
that we spoke to over the weekend). And while some people still hold those
traditional beliefs, which is perfectly fine and their own choice, Mr. W and I
are very happy that we already cohabitate, and we don't think it will be
detrimental to our married life; In fact, we believe that living together first
has been a great way to gain an even deeper understanding of one another. We
really do believe that marriage is forever, and while we had already decided to
get married before we moved in, it was definitely a nice way to reaffirm the
fact that we have chosen the best life partner in each-other.
The weekend wrapped up with a nice mini-graduation ceremony where each
couple was called up to receive their certificate of completion among cheers
and applause from the others.
The Bloggers with our certificate. Yay! /Personal picture
Honestly, it was a great experience for us and I highly recommend some
sort of marriage preparation before you get married, whether it's outside the
church or even privately in your own home. So many couples today say the vows
and commit their lives to one another without addressing so many important
issues beforehand. Did you take Pre-Cana? What was your experience with it?
Scenario #1, wedding dress shopping: I am going through the racks with a consultant after having stated my budget and she pulls a Paloma Blanca gown for me to try on.
Me: How much is this dress? I`m fairly sure it`s way over budget...
Venus Flytrap Consultant: Oh, don`t worry about that right now! First, try it on; then we can talk about the price if you love it.
Ha! Yeah right! Any bride in her right mind who has ever seen an episode of Say Yes to the Dress knows that you never EVER try on a gown outside your budget. The most likely outcome is you will fall in love with a dress you clearly can`t afford and every subsequent dress you try on will look like poop in comparaison.
It seems like some vendors want to trick you into falling in love with their product, even when it`s way outside your budget. You search their website and there is no mention of prices. You email them to ask for their prices, and they reply vaguely that they need to know more about your eventfirst, that they tailor their services to each client, yadda-yadda. You answer all their questions but they play hide-the-quote until they have managed to convince you to arrange a meeting face-to-face. They dazzle you with all the different customization options and add-ons. Then, when they think you`re hooked, they go in for the kill; they smile their best used-car salesman smile and slide a piece of paper across the table like a scene from the Godfather and stare at you while you take in the information and try not to cry. BAM. All of a sudden, you`re trapped. The whole thing is like a bad time-share presentation. See where I`m going with the whole Venus Flytrap thing? It`s kind of like the Parent Trap, but a lot less cute and a lot more akward.
Anyway... I know I sound very angry, and that`s because I am. I`ve unfortunately gotten caught in this situation more than once in our planning. It`s actually become a bit of a running joke: If Miss Blogger likes it, it must be the most expensive option around.
This happened to us while hunting for a photographer. I stumbled across P`s website and was instantly smitten with their photos, each one looked like a work of art. I forced myself to close my browser while I waited for their quote, no use in falling in love if we can`t afford them. I was thrilled when a few minutes later, I received an email stating at their prices started at x, the higher end of our budget, but still within it. I set up a meeting for the next night, and we drove to their studio. We sat there for an hour looking at glossy albums, watching amazing slideshow after amazing slideshow. It was all I could do not to drool all over my dress. I had entirely forgotten about the small matter of money until P. casually got up and handed us a price sheet. I almost fainted. It would have cost around 10,000$ for the entire package. Hive, I cried tears of rage the entire drive home. I mean, what a colossal waste of everybody`s time! I don`t even understand how that makes any sense from a business standpoint. I mean, they have to be aware that they`re definitely not "affordable", right? Why not let potential clients know your prices right up front? Especially after they've specifically enquired? After I got home, I emailed my contact asking about the astronomical difference in price and they answered that the starting price was for booking the junior assistant. I am not even joking.
The same thing happened again with a videographer. They used words like up-and-coming on their website, so I figured they would have up-and-coming prices to match. After several failed email attempts at asking them for a quote, we agreed to meet them on a Friday night. Hive, we got fooled twice. We sat through an hour and a half meeting with V, looking at their amazing wedding trailers, discussing our vision, and apparently wasting everybody`s time once again. We walked away with nothing but a quote for 5 grand and a whole lot of disappointment.
I don`t understand how this keeps happening to us. Mr. W says that I am no longer allowed to set up meetings with any more vendors, unless they have given us an estimate first.
Have you been in a similar situation?Please, tell me I`m not alone!
Hi. My name is Miss Waterfall and I`m a shoe-aholic.
Yes, it`s true. I have a bit of a footwear substance-abuse-problem(But I can stop any time I want!). I blame HBO and little miss Carrie Bradshaw for brainwashing me into this whole mess.
Anywhoo, yes, I admit it. I have a lot of shoes. A. LOT. OF. SHOES.
Some of my shoes, personal photo
Over the last few years I`ve amassed quite the collection. But it`s not my fault, seriously. We have to deal with serious weather issues up here in Canada, we have to be prepared for all four seasons! You need cute strappy sandals for summer and adorable Wellies for spring showers. You also need some gorgeous boots for the fall and not-so-gorgeous but practical boots for when sh*t gets really serious (aka winter). I have my sexy clubbing heels and my work appropriate lawyer heels. Then, I have flats for when said heels start to make my feet bleed. Really, these are necessities...
Yes, I love shoes. But they don`t love me back. I pretty much have the worst feet of all time. I have flat feet AND I had to get bunion surgery on both my feet a few years back and ever since then my feet are extremely sensitive. I`ll put on heels and be perfectly fine wearing them for a while and then, all of a sudden, they become incredibly painful and I can`t stand them for another second.
Since I am essentially required to wear heels as part of my everyday work wardrobe, I have designed several ways to get around this problem. I wear flats in the subway because looking fabulous is SO not worth having my feet aching by the time I make it to the office. I also have about 4 or 5 different pairs in my office at any given time so that I can switch them around when one pair starts to hurt; along with some comfy flats stashed under my desk for when nobody`s watching.
But what`s this all got to do with the `Bee?
Why, wedding shoes, of course. After giving it much thought, I decided that my foremost priority in wedding shoes is comfort, and I`m willing to accept it if they`re not the cutest shoes ever because frankly, they`ll be hidden under my dress for most of the day anyway. I just want to be comfortable and happy and not thinking about when I can finally kick them off.
Barefoot, Mr. W and I are roughly the same height (I may be an inch taller, but if I throw on heels, I`m a good 5 inches taller than him). And while I try not to let the height difference bother me normally, I don`t think it will look nice for our wedding photos if I`m towering over him. Therefore, I`ve decided I will stick to a fairly low/kitten heel and maybe get some shoes with added height for Mr. Waterfall to compensate, which most men`s dress shoes already have anyways.
To top it off, we are getting married in Old Montreal, and it`s recently dawned on me that while cobblestone is gorgeous and romantic, it`s also hell on heels. I tried wearing different types of shoes to church this summer to test them out on the cobblestone and am sorry to report that the experiment was a colossal failure. Not only are there pesky grooves in between each stone, but the actual stones aren’t even flat!
Speaking of flat -- flats are not an option because of my aforementioned flat feet. I cannot wear them for a whole day without getting huge cramps in my arches from lack of support.
So, I turn to the hive for advice! What should I do? I need your help! Has anyone been in a similar shoe pickle?
So, I love wine. I blame the French. I did a summer in Lyon after my first year of law school to study the law of the European Union and while I remember very little about the actual course, I got quite an education ... in wine. For those of you that don’t know, Lyon is in the Beaujolais region of France, a huge wine region. Wine was literally cheaper than water, and tasted amazing!
Miss Blogger sampling wine at a vineyard in Pays Lyon, Beaujolais region, circa 2006/ personal photo
We settled on DIY submerged centerpieces a while ago, and trying to find cheap vases in the width and style that we were looking for proved beyond difficult. Then, I came across Mrs Pain au Chocolat’s posts about cutting wine bottles and a light went off in my head. Brilliant! It would be cheap because we were already drinking plenty of wine, AND we would be recycling!
Anyways… we happily started collecting bottles and I finally got around to buying a glass cutter. This is not the exact one, but close enough.
I thought about buying a bottle cutter, but let's face it, I'm cheap, and the whole point of the project was to save money, not spend it. So, I figured my cheap 10$ glass cutting tool would do just fine for our purposes. So, back in december, while Mr. W was away on business, I figured I’d give it a whirl, because when the groom’s away, the bride will play (with sharp, stabby things, apparently).
The first issue I ran into was figuring out a way to get an even score line, so, I placed the bottle inside an ice bucket that came up to roughly where I wanted to cut, precariously holding the contraption between my thighs (probably mistake no.1) like so:
Then, I would hold the glass cutter against the bucket in one hand to keep it straight, while rotating the bottle with the other (all while attempting to take pictures).I understand now that this is much more easily accomplished as a two person team where one person holds the cutter and the other spins the bottle but I was trying to be a badass.
You can actually see the blade to the left here
Despite my questionable methods, I actually managed to get a very
even score line. Here it is against the light.
Everything was going smoothly until it came to time to stress the glass. First I tried heating the bottle over a candle and rubbing an ice cube on it. FAIL.
I kept trying different combinations of heat and cold but my failure grew more colossal by the bottle!
Attempts 3-6, after that I stopped taking pictures.
Verdict: Kids, don't try this at home! Or, you know...do, but just beware that it's NOT as easy as it looks. In any case, this project was a no-go for The Waterfalls. I give mad props to Mrs Pain au Choc and all the other bees who successfully completed it, but I ran out of patience after about 10 shattered wine bottles. I'm counting my blessings as it is that I walked away without impaling myself!
Needless to say, my glass cutter went back to the hardware store...
Did any of you have an epic DIY failure? Did you give up or decide to give it another go?
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